. We are nOt alone .

. . . I am groping about in this painful darkness, so alone and full of spiritual tears, a silent cry that reaches out beyond the infinite galaxies, directed to heaven with a resounding echo. But where are you? Why don’t you say something? What are you busy doing while I cry out my pain, my powerlessness, my solitude? Just clench your teeth, I told myself, and believe beyond all of this that you feel. Believe beyond that which is unbelievable, beyond the impossible, lose everything. Nothing, nothing should remain. I felt my soul crying. I had nothing left, a nothingness that was filled with everything, God alone . . .

but the answer always arrives * *

. . April Melodies * *

She closes her eyes because she doesn't wanna accept the truth about herself, myself . .

She looks up to the sky trying to find the sun as a source of illumination . . She tries to find the stars in order to reach happiness before dying. She has always loved the sea and the April sky as well as walking down the main street during winter time and the summer's poetry written in her hand.
She is such a mystery for me. She is a lover of everything that no one can see - She is a dreamer ever since she knew about her destiny.

She is who I wanna be - She is the mystery I am going to discover when she'd let me get in to the place where I have always wanted to be . . . .
HER WORLD

. . . the places you have come to fear the most *

The places you Have come to Fear the Most * *

"Buried deep as you can Dig inside yourself, And covered with A perfect shell, Such a charming Beautiful exterior. Laced with a brilliant smile And shining eyes Perfect posture But you're barely scraping by You're barely scraping by This is one time That you can't fake It hard enough to please Everyone or anyone at all. And the grave that You refuse to leave The refuge that You've built to flee The places that You have come to fear the most. Buried deep as you can Dig inside yourself, And hidden in the public eye. Such a stellar Monument to loneliness. Laced with brilliant smiles And shining eyes And perfect makeup But you're barely scraping by"

I am a coward, such a coward, that I always write what I feel because I don't what to cry over these feelings - I don't want to even realize that I am living within them.

I am a piece of poetry that is just telling all about the essence of sadness and fear

I am the happiest person when you are by my side
when I am able to kiss your blessed lips
when I am able to love you just in a simply sigh.
when cold turns to be a metaphor when our bodies come together
when your words are lyrics for my soul.

I am really happy . . when you are happy too.

But, what happen when you don't wanna be happy in the same way I wanna be? You start messing up my whole world at your own way, believing that you are such a magnificent artist that you are able to conquer foreign eyes just to leave them later on.
You play as you wouldn't know the rules - You play as the same way the wind plays ignoring my presence every now and then.

You are such a blind, deaf and heartless person . . .

Eyes that cannot see a poor girl who gives her life for your poetry; Ears that cannot hear myself yelling at night and heart that doesn't want to receive sincere and real love.
You are a coward, such a coward, that you always write what you feel because you don't what to cry over those feelings - You don't want to even realize that you are living within them.

Life has always treated you in the worst and hardest way, you have always cried endless salty rivers, Life has always been your worst enemy

But I just wanted to be your friend
I just wanted to simply love you twenty four seven
I just wanted to show you up in the sky the sun shining constantly
I just wanted to heal your injuries, to dry your tears once for all.
I just wanted to be part of your unique and lovely smile.

You didn't accept me - You wanted to - But you couldn't because your cowardice and fear didn't allow you to do it. And I cried you ever since you left me.

The truth is that I have never stopped loving you.

Linkin Park - What I've Done

IT'S JUST GREAT (:

IN THIS FAREWELL,
THERE’S NO BLOOD,
THERE’S NO ALIBI.
‘CAUSE I’VE DRAWN REGRET,
FROM THE TRUTH,
OF A THOUSAND LIES.

SO LET MERCY COME,
AND WASH AWAY…

WHAT I’VE DONE.
I’LL FACE MYSELF,
TO CROSS OUT WHAT I’VE BECOME.
ERASE MYSELF,
AND LET GO OF WHAT I’VE DONE.

PUT TO REST,
WHAT YOU THOUGHT OF ME.
WHILE I CLEAN THIS SLATE,
WITH THE HANDS,
OF UNCERTAINTY.

SO LET MERCY COME,
AND WASH AWAY…

WHAT I’VE DONE.
I’LL FACE MYSELF,
TO CROSS OUT WHAT I’VE BECOME.
ERASE MYSELF,
AND LET GO OF WHAT I’VE DONE.

FOR WHAT I’VE DONE

I START AGAIN,
AND WHATEVER PAIN MAY COME.
TODAY THIS ENDS,
I’M FORGIVING WHAT I’VE DONE.

I’LL FACE MYSELF,
TO CROSS OUT WHAT I’VE BECOME.
ERASE MYSELF,
AND LET GO OF WHAT I’VE DONE.
(NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA NA)
WHAT I’VE DONE.

"All day long with heavY metAl songs by your side"

Just a phase . .

"I do no longer belong to these lands,
I have been forgotten and
I stand alone, trying to stay alive"

"Arms that are invisibles to the eyes but not to the soul

that protect you and dry the tears from your face.
An unconditional friend who is by your side everywhere at the moment you need it.
It brings you the chance to dream, the freedom to escape.
It brings you the opportunity to fly at least for a while . . "

"I feel so empty here without you. I am looking for you, where are you now?
Where is the man, that long time ago, showed me the way life of the hopeless people could change into something amazing? - You have gone. You are not where I left you.
The chains are on the floor and you are not tied to them. You have walked away leaving me here, alone , with nothing else to do or to feel."

"But my destiny has been already chosen and I can’t change it. So it ‘s the end of a story without a sky, without a sun. A story with darkness all around."

((this phases where written by me when I was 13 years old))

Dear Mary Poppins,

"The biggest word you ever head and this is how it goes
Oh, supercalifragilistic expialidocious
Even though the sound of it is
something quite atrocious
If you say it loud enough
you'll always sound precocious
Supercalifragilistic expialidocious"

"A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down
The medicine go down - Medicine go down
Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine
go down in the most delightful way"



"Have you even seen
The grass so green
Or a bluer sky
Oh, it's a jolly holiday with Mary
Mary makes your heart so light
When the day is gray and ordinary
Mary makes the sun shine bright
Oh, happiness is blooming all around her
The daffodils are smiling at the dove
When Mary holds your hand you feel so grand
Your heart starts beating like a big brass band"

"While the moon drifts in the skies

Stay awake don't close your eyes

Though the world is fast asleep

Though your pillow's soft and deep

You're not sleepy as you seem

Stay awake don't nod and dream

Stay awake don't nod and dream"  

Dear Mary Poppins,
DO NEVER FORGET THAT THE LITTLE CHILDREN NEED YOU BECAUSE YOU BRING TO US THE REAL MEANING OF BELIEVING . .

YOU MAKE OURSELVES REMEMBERED THAT WE ARE FULL OF IMAGINATION . .

IN YOUR WORLD THERE IS NO SADNESS NEITHER PAIN.

YOUR WORLD IS WHERE DRAMS COME TRUE . . WE WANT TO LIVE WHERE YOU LIVE MARY POPPINS.

THANK YOU FOR GIVING US SOMETHING WORTH LIVING FOR,

THANK YOU FOR MAKING US REALIZED THAT OUR HEART IS MUCH MORE STRONGER THAN OUR MIND.

YOU ARE WHAT EVERY HUMAN BEING NEEDS
A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR

The perfect song in an Imperfect Moment *

I don't mind where you come from
As long as you come to me
I don't like illusions I can't see
Them clearly

I don't care no I wouldn't dare
To fix the twist in you
You've shown me eventually
What you'll do

I don't mind…
I don't care…
As long are you're here

Go ahead tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
Do it all over again
It's all the same

Hours slide and days go by
Till you decide to come
And in between it always seems too long
All of a sudden

And I have the skill, yeah I have the will
To breathe you in while I can
However long you stay
Is all that I am

I don't mind…
I don't care…
As long are you're here

Wrong or right
Black or white
If I close my eyes
I's all the same

In my life
The compromise
I close my eyes
It's all the same

((thanks Vale M for showing me this song))

I would like to close my eyes and never opening them again at least for a while.

There are feeling and thoughts that I keep inside of me hidden from the outside world; no one knows about them, sometimes not even myself. But recently I felt that I couldn't keep on fighting on my own. I simply felt that I wanted to give up just for a few minutes because the weight on my shoulders was killing me.
I decided to go to Church early in the evening in order to pray before Mass.
It was only me and him although it was full of people on their knees giving themselves into his grace. I cried and I laughed; I read the two first lectures and I asked him to help all of us to live each day with happiness and faith.

These three hours in Church were the only hours of peace that I had during my whole weekend - Yes, it was a harsh weekend indeed. And at some point I felt weak and abandoned and I am still feeling a little like that.
Right in this moment I am not feeling well and I just need someone to hug me because I am sad.

The song above is the perfect song with the perfect rhythm for this imperfect moment in which my home is a broken home, when I am missing both of you too much and I am feeling under pressure almost every minute of every hour of every day.

I love spring time and the blue sky with its perfect clouds

It hurts too mUch . . .

"It's never easy to understand why memories hold our hand
But people let go . . . "

I don't know which direction should I take
Just to get to you once for all.
Sometimes I think that you are the one that is wrong
But I am starting to think that I am the one who is not right.
Because it hurts too much to go to bed
Knowing that you have gone, long time ago.

I am giving up because I can't keep on pretending that I am fine
I am just saying that you have caused so much pain on me
That I can't even find the suitable words to explain it.
I would like to scream once more to the world
That I am a human being too -
Would someone ever ask me if I am alright?

It hurts too much because I am feeling like crying
But the tears will not come out
Until my time would come to take me away.
I have learned that no one cares about how I am
But I will keep caring about everyone else
Because that's the way He have taught me to be

In the end He is the only one who is always by me side
Carrying me on his shoulders
He Is a person whose grace is the most beautiful thing
I have ever known.


You are the only one who loves me for who I am . . .

"I know I am dead on the surface, but I am screaming underneath"

Punk Rock Music *

Singing the songs I love the most -

Loving God's grace - Praying for you to come back,
Trying not to cry - Looking for an excuse
Dying, Living and Flying.

Many times I tried not to tell you the truth about myself
Many times I thought I could do everything perfectly
This time I am feeling different
This time I am enjoying what I have
Who I am is who I wanna be

Punk Rock music and a History booK
Laying on my bed thinking about everyone else
Reminding myself that I am happy - God dammed I am happy

Thinking about what I have to do for tomorrow
I find myself living a beautiful adventure
Where there is no rules
Where I am never alone

I felt in love with you, Dear God.
I felt in love with life
I can't believe this is happening to me,
Lucky browned-eye girl
This is my time, This is my place


. . . . She likes Papa Roach and Sex Pistols too